I have been separated and now divorced. What do I do now? Sometimes I feel like my life has clear direction and at other times I feel like I don’t know what I am doing or where I’m headed. At times my life seems to have absolutely no meaning from my point of view. So how do I get passed this?
The easy and cliché thing to say is to pray and let the Lord work things out. In my pain I used to hate it when people told me things like that. I was already praying. Before the separation or the divorce ever occurred I was praying.
So when I’m feeling like my life has no meaning the first thing I like to do is talk to someone. It is very important whom you choose to talk to. It has to be someone you can trust with your life. If someone like this is not available to me I will often sit down and write in my journal. And in my journal I record my feelings and situations that may be affecting me at the time. I also try not to make an entry without writing my desires and a prayer to the Lord. This is great therapy. Sometimes months later I go back a read them and discover many times that God has answered my prayer.
Another important thing to do is increase my faith. How do I do this? By reading scripture. God says something completely different about my situation than what I see with my eyes. I read until I see things the way He see them. That is called faith. Before I know it instead of believing that separation and divorce has ruined my life, I am agreeing with God that, “all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose”. (Romans 8:28)
Separation and Divorce are devastating, especially if you have children. I watched my kids suffer the affects of the situation. I was having a hard time. I can only imagine what they must have been going through. And if you have kids in this situation you owe it to them to sit them down and talk about it. They need to know the truth so they don’t blame themselves for something that had nothing to do with them. They need to be able to express what they are feeling. If you can’t help them with this get them in to see a psychologist. When it comes to your kid’s emotion health money should not be an issue. And if you don’t have the money there are other ways to get them the help they need.
Sometimes with separation and divorce it is hard to know which way is up. Hang in there. Your life is worth living with or without your spouse or your kids. But if you have kids you have a reason to live. You have a responsibility to live and succeed and you will.
Tony Tate contributes articles to http://www.1-on-line-dating.com a website focused on relationships and online dating. You may also find article written by Tony at: http://dating-and-relationships.blogspot.com/